“The British Museum underground station, painted by Giger.”
Tura
Sunday 1 January 2023
“The British Museum underground station, painted by Giger.”
Sunday 16 October 2022
Image location.
Wednesday 28 April 2021
The Inventions of Pizza
I
Pizza is not popular in China, and imported Western pizza chains have met with indifferent success. This is despite the fact that pizza was first invented there, more than two thousand years ago, during the Qin dynasty. It was eaten by all classes of society, high and low, and every village would have its own communal pizza oven and characteristic recipes.
But one day, at a great state banquet, one of the guests suddenly picked up his pizza and flung it, frisbee style, at the Emperor. The circular blade concealed inside by a treasonous cook decapitated him.
Pizzas were henceforth banned throughout the Middle Kingdom, pizza ovens and recipes were destroyed, and the very word was expunged from the language.
II
Once upon a time there was a baker. His genius was not content to bake the same loaves every day, and he experimented with every conceivable method of baking bread, and baking every foodstuff into it: aubergine bread, sardine bread, pistachio marzipan bread.
Once, he had a surplus of unsold bread, that would go stale. He broke it up and baked it into a new batch, creating the renowned “pane del pane”, or “bread bread”.
His greatest invention was to bake a layer of cheese onto a flatbread, and embed therein a variety of vegetables and meat. A fad for this novelty swept through his city, which thereafter gave its name to the dish: Pisa.
Shorter versions of these stories first appeared on Laurence Simon’s 100 Word Story Weekly Challenge.
Wednesday 23 December 2020
404: A Christmas Story
Marley’s web pages were dead: to begin with. No sooner had Scrooge returned from the funeral than he had deleted every page of Marley’s “blog”, for which he had begrudged every kilobyte.
But that night he awoke from uneasy sleep to find a ghostly figure in his bedroom chanting “404! 404!”
“You don’t exist,” said Scrooge testily. “You’re that piece of cheese I had for supper.”
But the figure only said, “Come!” and Scrooge found himself compelled to follow as it drew him beyond the walls of his house and across the earth.
“The Library of Alexandria!” it declared, and Scrooge found himself amidst its burning. “404!”
“Plays and poetry!” retorted Scrooge. “Stuff and nonsense!”
It spoke again, “The archives of the Medici Bank!” and Scrooge was surrounded by workmen carting away stacks of old ledgers as waste paper. “404!”
Scrooge shivered with fear.
Finally, it said, “Ebenezer Scrooge!” and there was nothing but “404! 404! 404!” and Scrooge awoke.
Friday 2 October 2020
Thursday 27 August 2020
Image credit: Marcin Bajer, abandoned airport. CC BY-NC 2.0