Place

There once was a cobbler who made shoes so fine
That he always had meat on the table, and wine
Not for him the rough beer of the unlettered peasant
He had coin and preferred to drink something more pleasant.

He was best and he knew it, no need to be humble
But his neighbours would gather to gossip and grumble.
“He lives like a lord while for us life’s a bitch
“We’d rather go unshod than see him grow rich!”
But in private each one went to him for their shoes
And willingly paid him, whatever their views.

“I make what you want, and you’re willing to pay”
Said the cobbler, “You can all buy elsewhere any day.
“I work all the hours that God sends to me
“Do you think I should work for you all day for free?”
But the more trade they brought him the more they complained
And on church days both he and his wife were disdained.

The moral of this is abundantly clear:
Big fish in small ponds should eat bread and drink beer.

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A shorter version of this will appear at Crap Mariner’s 100 Word Story Challenge today.

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When

Oh will you be my wife, my love

Oh will you be my wife?

Build me a castle fit for a queen

Oh then I'll be your wife.

Here is a castle fit for a queen

Oh will you be my wife?

Make a garden as far as the eye can see

Oh then I'll be your wife.

Here's the finest garden in all the land

With arbours and fountains on every hand

Oh will you be my wife?

When the stars go out and the sun grows cold

And moths have eaten all your gold

Oh then I'll be your wife.

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I saw the Devil

I went out to the woods one night
No goblins or bogeys can me affright
I looked for my cronies by the hollow oak tree
Then I saw the Devil and the Devil saw me.

“Yer mates have fled home and bolted the door”
says the Devil, “they’ll never have sleep no more”
So I spits in his eye and I says to he,
“You can scare off my mates but you won’t scare me.”

He showed me his demons on a darkling plain
And the souls of the damned in eternal flame
Then I showed him my business that I came out to do
And the Devil ran off and his little imps too.

When I go out to the woods of a night
The Devil himself can’t me affright
For the Devil looked within me and saw worse than he
When I saw the Devil and the Devil saw me.

 

This is a longer version of my contribution this week to Crap Mariner's weekly challenge. Poetic necessity overflowed the bound of 100 words.

The Cobbler and the Devil (musical version)

For the words, see here, and for the longer story, here. And here's a PDF of the music that will be more readable than the image below.

I have neither a singing voice nor a banjo, but if anyone else wants to perform this, go right ahead.

The Cobbler and the Devil (remix)

The devil met a cobbler, disguised as just a man
And said “Can you make boots for me, as fast as e’er you can?”
The cobbler said, “Two silver coins, and you’ll walk in them this day.”
But when he drew his old boots off, he was in the Devil’s pay.

Two cloven hoofs he saw there, that singed the wooden floor
And the Devil sneering at him, ’twixt him and the workroom door.
He worked hard to make the Devil’s shoes the best that they could be
And all the while thinking harder how from the Devil he might be free.

The work was done as the sun went down and the Devil leapt up high
And his hooves came down into those boots — and the Devil in pain did cry
For the soles were lined with the covers torn off from the book of God's own Word
And the cobbler still has the Devil’s coins, if it’s all true that I’ve heard.

         The crack of doom shall swallow up this world
         And all that is upon it be destroyed
         Resolved into components unalloyed
         Its atoms rent and into space be hurled.