404: A Christmas Story

Marley’s web pages were dead: to begin with. No sooner had Scrooge returned from the funeral than he had deleted every page of Marley’s “blog”, for which he had begrudged every kilobyte.

But that night he awoke from uneasy sleep to find a ghostly figure in his bedroom chanting “404! 404!”

“You don’t exist,” said Scrooge testily. “You’re that piece of cheese I had for supper.”

But the figure only said, “Come!” and Scrooge found himself compelled to follow as it drew him beyond the walls of his house and across the earth.

“The Library of Alexandria!” it declared, and Scrooge found himself amidst its burning. “404!”

“Plays and poetry!” retorted Scrooge. “Stuff and nonsense!”

It spoke again, “The archives of the Medici Bank!” and Scrooge was surrounded by workmen carting away stacks of old ledgers as waste paper. “404!”

Scrooge shivered with fear.

Finally, it said, “Ebenezer Scrooge!” and there was nothing but “404! 404! 404!” and Scrooge awoke.

---

Christmas

I remember that night. Place was packed, so I let them doss down in a shed. Then the portents start. New stars, angels, sorcerors wanting in on the action. Something to tell my grandkids, I thought.

Later, though, I hear stories. Imagine having a two-year-old God in your village! He killed people on a whim, no-one could touch him, he'd just do worse. And the pranks, by Mithras! So, he grows up, gets some sense but not enough, then it seems the juju’s going away. Didn’t take long to get him nailed up then.

I just hope he stays dead.

---

And if you’d like to know more about what it’s like to have a two-year-old God in your village, look up the Infancy Gospel of Thomas. It’s 2nd century New Testament horror fanfiction, and very popular in the Middle Ages.

I do wonder if Jerome Bixby’s classic SF story “It’s a good life” was inspired by it.

Merry Christmas, anyway.

---

This story first appeared on Crap Mariner’s 100 Word Story Weekly Challenge.
Image credit: Digitized Sky Survey (DSS), STScI/AURA, Palomar/Caltech, and UKSTU/AAO.

Waiting for Santa Claus

A play in one act.

A living room. Night. A Christmas tree. Two small children.

Tina (the older one): Scott.

Scott (the other one): What?

T: Did you ever read the nativity story?

S: (He reflects.) I read the pictures.

T: What's "myrrh"? Everyone says they brought gold, somethingsomething, and "myrrh".

S: (examining his foot) Maybe it's what they make mirrors from.

T: Santa Claus might know.

S: Will he come?

T: We sent word...

(Long pause.)

T: (getting up) Let's go to bed.

S: We can't.

T: Why not?

S: We're waiting for Santa Claus.

(T sits down.)

(Long pause.)

S: Let's go.

T: Let's.

(They do not move.)

---

A Christmas Wish

On a Sunday it is pleasant to wander the Flohmarkt, especially now the Christmas lights are out.  I picked up a faded daguerrotype.  It was of the old Meyerplatz, from before the War.  A bright spring morning, draymen loading their horse-drawn carts, and in the middle, a young man striding assuredly across the square, a bundle under his arm.

“What do you wish, sir?” asked the stallholder.

The carts rattled and jingled; one of the new trams slowly drew into the square.  And in the fresh spring air, I strode briskly on to my bachelor lodgings, with bread fresh from the baker’s.

---

Potzdamer Platz, Berlin, 1890 / CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Snowglobes

•

Snow falls endlessly

On the night before Christmas

In the toy village.

•

In the snowy fort

No soldiers patrol the walls

Are they all on leave?

•

Snow on online pines

If no-one logs in to see

Did the snowflake fall?

•

Presents! All for me?

Take as many as you like

They're copiable.

Tura has made some snowglobes.

There are four different scenes, each made as either a table ornament, or a bauble to hang on a tree. Particle snow falls endlessly.